Breaking News: Delhomme & Carr Press Conference

Charlotte, North Carolina – Panthers facilities

In response to recent press conferences called by Vinny Testaverde, QBs Jake Delhomme and David Carr called a press conference of their own tonight. At precisely two minutes past midnight, the Panthers QBs entered the room decked out like Bon Jovi groupies circa 1986. The room of reporters stifled laughs. This ought to be good, I thought to myself. As the familiar sounds of Bon Jovi’s “Livin’ on a Prayer” began to play, Delhomme informed us they had something to say in response to Testaverde’s recent press conferences.

Full transcript of Carr and Delhomme’s Press Conference follows:

Carr: “Jakey used to play first string
His elbow went on strike
He’s down on his luck…it’s tough, so tough
Delhomme: David cleans his gloves all day
With a sore back, tryin’ to keep the pain at bay
For glove – for glove

Delhomme and Carr: He says we’ve got to hold on to what we’ve got
cause it doesn’t make a difference
If we make it or not
We’ve got each other and that’s a lot
For glove – we’ll give it a shot

Chorus:
Whooah, were half way there
Vinny hasn’t got a prayer
Take my hand and we’ll make it – I swear
Vinny hasn’t got a prayer

Delhomme: Vinny’s got his Heisman in hock
Now he’s holding in what he used
To make it talk – so tough, it’s tough
Carr: Vinny dreams of starting on gameday
When we challenge Vinny to fight,
He tells us we’ll regret this, someday

Delhomme and Carr: We’ve got to hold on to what we’ve got
cause it doesn’t make a difference
If we make it or not
We’ve got each other and that’s a lot
For glove – we’ll give it a shot

We’ve got to hold on ready or not
Our spots on the team, its all that we’ve got.”

-Your Gridiron Goddess